Thursday, January 26, 2006

Capitalism is Kanye's middle name

Controversy sells and Kanye West is developing himself into a master propogandist not seen since the likes of P.T. Barnum and Bill Clinton. Who thought his boorish comments about Pres. Bush could be topped? Ah, well, you have under-estimated Mr. Potato Head who poses on the cover of the latest Rolling Stone "as Jesus Christ in a crown of thorns."

The demagogue's love life appears to be causing some controversy in its own right. It seems that his current girlfriend, (former MTV secretary?) Brooke Crittendon, may be crowding Mr. Potato Head's space. According to Brooke, "I don't think we've ever been apart longer than seven days ... He's got so much going on, but he never makes me feel like I'm No. 2."

See might want to rethink that last comment. If the rumors are true, Mr. Head may be planning his own chocolate city by pimping himself out to Pamela Anderson and her prodigious mammillas.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

More on the chocolate city

I have a good friend in the New Orleans area who stole a van to escape the wrath of Hurricane Katrina. He's back home now, safe and sound. Asking him how it was in the chocolate city, he replied with an insightful view on the situation:
Funny thing about the chocolate thing is when Nagin explained it after the infamous speech ... he explained that if you mix dark chocolate with milk, you get a delicious drink. Now, I don't know about you, but last time I made chocolate milk, I had to use much more milk than chocolate ... I believe that speech guaranteed that will be the mix ... as the ones with the money are going to be hesitant to bend over backward after the comments he made ... don't expect any of the projects to open back up anytime this decade, and well, 9th ward and the east I'm sure will see an onslaught of new and unseen layers of bureaucracy before utilities are restored to a point of resettling the areas.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Michael Schiavo files for marriage license

Some would liken the case of Terry Schiavo to that of Mark Hacking and Laci Peterson — all situations of straight-up murder. Now comes word from Florida that Terry Schiavo's husband, Michael, plans to marry long-time girlfriend and mother of his two young children.
Michael Schiavo Applies for Marriage License: "Nearly a year after her death, the husband of Terri Schiavo has applied for a marriage license. The St. Petersburg Times reports Michael Schiavo and his longtime girlfriend took the action Friday. The pair live together and have two young children. Relatives say the wedding will likely take place before Valentine's Day. Terri Schiavo was at the center of a lengthy end-of-life case that captured the world's attention. She suffered irreversible brain damage in 1990 and died in 2005, 13 days after her feeding tube was removed with court approval."